Thursday, September 20, 2007

We Interrupt This Program...

(a series involving radical departures from regular blog topics.)

...to call attention to the U.S. Women's World Cup team uniforms. The home uniforms ("kits") have gold as their base color. Check it out for yourself. I haven't looked at the updated U.S. Federal Government web pages, but last time I checked the colors of the country's flag were red, white and blue. Gold is not one of them, notwithstanding comments about American wealth and commercialism.

I'm already troubled by the fact that soccer goalkeepers have a different color jersey than the rest of their team, often one that isn't even a variation of the club colors - what kind of team uniform is that? Now we have an entire soccer team wearing different colors than the country for which they play. What is with this?

Lou Holtsth's Pregame Thspeechesth (and other comments on ESPN's college football studio crew)

One of the lamer aspects of ESPN's college football runup show College Football Live is Lou Holtz's pregame speeches. Each week Lisping Lou delivers an inspirational tome in the guise of a team's coach preparing the kids for a big game.

Unsurprisingly, the speeches are full of cliches and syrupy pep-talk material. Speaking as Lloyd Carr, Lou told the team to have eyes in the front of their heads so they could look forward, not backward. How thrilling.

Imitating Joe Paterno, he suggested Michigan was arrogant: "I bet they do the crossword puzzle in pen because they think they never make a mistake. They made a mistake when they scheduled Penn State."

OK...Penn State is in the Big Ten Conference. The conference office schedules the games, not Michigan. Maybe he's harkening back to his days at independent Notre Dame, when anyone who came into South Bend had elected to schedule the school.

I'm surprised he didn't use the pun Penn Statement.
Holtz's cheesy speeches are nice enough to listen to, but I'd never give one to my team. The feature is ok, but its fatal flaw is that the pre-game speeches are overwrought Hollywood plot devices more than genuine football pageantry.

In his retrospective video "The Schembechler Years," Michigan coach Bo Schembechler let the air out of the balloon, saying specifically that the idea of the fire-them-up halftime speech was "a misnomer" - partly because halftime is to make adjustments, and partly because the time to motivate with speeches is during the week, at whatever time the coach feels an extra touch is needed. Coaches will tell you that usually a high-energy speech right before the game is a mixed blessing, as the players might get too woudn up to execute, and then be unable to refocus if the game gets away from them.

I want to go on a little further about College Football Live, CF Scoreboard, and CF Final, all of which are variations on the same format with the same people, led by the looong stretchy accent of Rece Davis (if anyone knows where Davis' accent comes from, please enlighten me). The show used to be a hip and fun rundown of that week's college football action, mixing long-form highlights with short but sharp analysis. Things have gradually changed over the years, and not for the better.

Opinions on Mark May are well-documented in the blogosphere (here, for example, and here, which really comments on the whole bunch) and in accordance with blog policy I will not repeat them. I enjoy hearing his opinions, even if I don't agree, although his rep took a hit with me when he delivered a racist hysteria after Kentucky hired Rich Brooks instead of the clearly inferior candidate Doug Williams. (Brooks is white and Williams black, as is May.)

Guys with opinions are what make the show. My real problem is that they've gone from commentators to half-concealed cheerleaders, complete with shtick. Case in point: the chanting of "Sweed, Sweed, Sweed, Sweed!" when Texas receiver Limas Sweed comes up on highlights. It's almost like they're having too much fun in the studio to consider whether the people watching want to hear it.

Then there's the negatives. These guys get a kick out of mocking crappy college football programs, the sacrificial lambs that serve as fodder for the top teams ESPN likes to suck up to. Rece Davis thinks nothing of condescendingly saying "that's why you're Vanderbilt" when showing a Commodore miscue. His lame "fighting [coach names]" becomes belittling when he's talking about a bad team. Illinois (who still stinks despite Ron Zook's recruiting binge) is "the fighting Zookers." Stanford becomes the "non-fighting Walt Harrises."

It's like to make up for the suckup, they feel the need to rip someone else, as if taking down Duke football showed originality in journalism. Lou Holtz may be a big Notre Dame shill, but at least he's not part of cutting down 20-year olds on national television.

I think what's really going on is a sort of postadolescent jocksniffing. I don't know if Rece Davis played ball or not - for all I know, he was All-State - but he seems to have an infantile need to stick it to the weak sisters. Maybe it's sitting near May, winner of a national title and two Super Bowls, who himself appears stuck in some kind of football machismo. Only Holtz shows a consistent semblance of class, although he sometimes goes overboard - as he does with his reflexive references to teams as "the University of Florida" and "the University of Notre Dame" to name two examples. What does he think, these football programs are trying to be schools?

Until Further Notice

Fact: USC is Number 1. We can quibble about strength of schedule, the early bye week, etc as the season goes on. For right now, SC held serve at home and then went on the road and pounded a legitimate opponent into submission in its own house. When you run for 300 yards on Nebraska (who has had consistently strong defenses through all its upheaval), the nation should take note. I’m comfortable putting the Trojans at the top until they show otherwise, or until Florida or LSU get another quality win by a healthy margin. Does anyone want to try to tell me Nebraska is a worse opponent than the overrated Virginia Tech squad that played torro to LSU's bullfighters? (In the weak Big XII, Oklahoma will need an exceptionally strong set of performances, and since it’s well-known that Bob Stoops runs up the score, voters should be very careful how much weight they give to OU’s margin of victory.)

What about the Ducks? Oregon looks as-yet unstoppable, but I’m not sold yet; I’m Tina and I’m not going back to Ike until November comes without any bruises. Ever since 2002, with one exception Oregon has had a bad habit of tanking down the stretch.

I will seen Oregon (@ Stanford) in person this week; I’ll revise and/or strengthen my opinion after that.

San Jose State got shut out by Stanford, 37-0, and after a lame and uninspired effort Spartans coach Dick Tomey put out a serious warning:
Well we were awful, we were badly coached. We were a bunch of prima donnas. We just don't compete. We are going to practice at 6:30 in the morning. Full gear. Anybody not there is cut and any coach who is not there is fired. We've got a short time to put this thing together but right now were just the [blank]. Stanford's really improved their game and that just shows how much better their coaches are then we are. How much better their players are than we are. They've done a great job. I commend coach Harbaugh and his staff.
Keep in mind this is nearing 11pm. After a busride home, the players weren't going to get to bed until after midnight. I'm all for morning practices, but 6:30 the morning after a game is beyond the pale. Coming off a 9-4 season, San Jose State was supposed to have its best team in its three years under Tomey, but three tough road games (Arizona State, Kansas State and Stanford) and injuries to its one-two running punch may have put them out of another good season.

Misnomer of the Week: “You can’t lose your job to injury”

I haven't done the researchy-things to figure out where this idea came from, but football fans appear to be walking around with the idea that a starter's job belongs to him no matter how much time he misses with injury. You may have seen "coach" Dick Butkus saying this in his fraudulent ESPN reality show.

In Michigan's dilemma over the injured Chad Henne and the true freshman fill-in Ryan Mallett, fans are suggesting Henne's position on the depth chart is sacrosanct. (Mallett has shown little to graduate him past a three-year starter, but in two weeks' time he might have a thick enough resume to merit a competition.)

This discussion reached the height of proposterity in the Brady vs Bledsoe debate in 2001. When anyone with eyes could see Brady was the best guy for Bill Belichick's strategy, Bledsoe hardliners cried about how unfair it would be for the incumbent to not get back on the field when he recovered from the shorn artery that opened the door for one of the biggest stars in American sports. (Three Super Bowls later...)

This axiom is a bogus idea. In the football meritocracy, the best players play - period. Sometimes your half-injured guy is better than the backup. Sometimes the backup comes in and tears it up, and might even encourage the coaching staff to change up the gameplan to fit the new guy's skills. And occasionally you find that diamond in the rough who just needed a shot of game action to prove himself.

It appears to be an unspoken policy in the NFL; but it's different in the pros - players aren't rapidly developing with experience and playing time, and it's rarely the case that you simply can't play a promising player because of myriad shortcomings that mollify with experience. It's pretty clear who's better than whom, and the best guys play when they're not on the training table.

Let's put it in perspective: if you couldn't lose your spot because you were on the mend, no one would know who Lou Gehrig is.

AROUND THE PAC-10

It was another big weekend for the state of Oregon. After the Ducks pantsed Michigan and Oregon State's flopover provided another plus in Cincinnati coach Brian Kelly's Michigan head coaching application packet, both teams managed to win last weekend.

The state of Washington wasn't too bad either. While UW lost at home to Ohio State, it was not your average 19-point loss if you've been following Washington football. This was a full stadium, watching a team go toe-to-toe for close to three quarters with a national championship contender. The Huskies were not afraid to deploy QB Jake Locker in triple-option schemes, and he threw a frozen rope touchdown pass that must have broken the receiver's hand.

Meanwhile, Washington State slapped border sister Idaho around, tacking on more points than USC did (45 to 38). (The Vandals also scored four touchdowns, 18 points more than they did against the Trojans). Alex Brink threw for over 400 yards again, and the Cougs have scored 111 points in three games.

UCLA coach Karl Dorrell got exposed again in an ugly 44-6 loss at Utah in which the Bruins turned it over five times. Anyone who thought UCLA was even a dark-horse national championship contender had been in the smog too long, but I'm the biggest UCLA doubter west of the Central Valley and I didn't see this one coming.

The embarassment of Arizona football continues, a 29-27 loss to New Mexico being the latest insult. It's brutal to make these predictions this early, but it will be a race between Mike Stoops and Dorrell to fax those resumes out to get dibs on the best assistant coaching jobs for next season.

Floppycock Of The Week
There won't even be a list of finalists. It's gotta be Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis. I won't even bother linking to the criticisms; I can't open my apartment door without being hit with another hyperlink to ND hysteria (from Domer blogs) or schadenfreude (from everyone else).

It's hard to describe from a straight football standpoint how hosed Notre Dame is. Meechigan didn’t play out of its mind, but the execution was masterful – every Notre Dame mistake got punished. Turnovers were turned into points. Missed blocks turned into sacks. No running game led to a ridiculous pass rush. Notre Dame gave plenty of opportunity, and Michigan capitalized every time, even with a true freshman playing his first full game under center.

Playing well against an inferior Notre Dame team is, well, something for Michigan to be proud of given their recent history against inferior Notre Dame teams (1998, 2004, 2005).

But back to Domer Nation - In the interest of preventing redundancy, I will attempt to add two fresh points to the discussion after Weis laid that thousand-yard shellshock stare on the media after the game.

First, this team is poorly coached in the fundamentals. Before you even get into coverages, blitzes, pass-protection schemes, combination routes, you've gotta coach the basics - stance, steps, leverage, snapping the ball, handing off, blocking, tackling, catching, and the like. The recent evidence suggests - nay, proves - that Notre Dame has been slacking off practicing these things. Hundreds of high school centers who aren't going to Notre Dame on scholarship can execute a shotgun snap without a problem for an entire season.

This leads to…

Second, I'm questioning Weis’ ability to coach his program. Notre Dame has way more talent than what's getting on the field. The results suggest either gross coaching incompetence, or a disconnect between coaches and players. (Stanford fans will notice the team looks a lot like the Cardinal's 2006 squad - listless, passionless, without cohesion or a sense of team).

Weis is obviously a good football man and knows his X's and O's, but I think he's made major miscalculations regarding:

a. Managing a depth chart when there is no waiver wire to get new guys. They seemed to spend a lot of time running up the score with Quinn's crew instead of getting experience for new guys.

b. What needs to be done to turn 18-year old former high schoolers into complete class-A football players. That's probably a pro thing, where the players already have a full toolbox of skills and you maintain them with some drills (or let them bleed away, more accurately). The bad snaps and the regression of their highest-profile recruit (Sam Young, started as a true freshman last year) indicate this.

It's possible he saw USC tearing things up and thought you just bring in the top players and they automatically play at an All America level. NFL-centric types love to tell me that "college coaches aren't that smart, they just get the best players." He's totally in love with his own intelligence, so Weis may have bought into that and skimped on talent development, expecting natural ability to take over.

Another thing: The offensive line has stunk, big time, and Domers are content to blame the line coaches and demand that they be fired. But is it possible these guys aren't that hot on their coach sticking them with a true freshman at quarterback and relegating the seniors to a rebuilding season? In a larger sense, could it be that the elder statesmen of the team - the ones recruited to work in Tyrone Willingham's non-boastful, head-down program - don't care much for having an arrogant gasbag at the top?

Going back to his history, Weis may only now be realizing that the Bill Belichick way, cutting any malcontents without reconciliation, simply can't work in college football.

Someone told me we were "overreacting to the latest data point." There's not one latest data point - there's five, as in five straight blowout losses, each one a deeper miasma than the one before it.

A final point: Why did Weis run off quarterback Demetrius Jones? In the beginning, it sounded like Jones' transfer to Northern Illinois (a bizarre and unclear story at this point to begin with) was simply a case of a guy who got beat out and wanted to play elsewhere. Then Jones fired back against the impression he snuck out the back door without telling the team by suggesting Weis misled him about his shot to be the starter. (Side note: Jones' bio is still available on Notre Dame's athletic site.)

Notre
Dame has had success (Arnaz Battle, Carlyle Holiday) in turning their castoff running quarterbacks into wide receivers. Hell, they’ve had a guy flip-flopping between tailback and linebacker (Travis Thomas), but apparently Jones was promised he wouldn't be split wide for someone else to throw to.

Another good dual-threat player Notre Dame couldn’t make use of became a legend at his new school – Northwestern quarterback Zak Kustok, who was an absolute star for his two seasons in Randy Walker’s super-spread offense.

Either Jones had an attitude problem, or they asked him to switch positions and he said no), or he got run off. Any of these make someone look bad, and I'm inclined to expect more from a middle-aged coach than a 19-year old ballplayer who lives under said coach's fist.